Monday, October 15, 2007
Two Great Inventions
This post is dedicated to my fellow engineer in training Dan the Man Schaef Daddy.
I have two ideas for businesses/inventions that I think would make some pretty good cash or at least a few laughs.
The first is a Hourier service. Notice that it's Courier with the C changed to a H so it's pronounced like Hurrier. The purpose of my Hourier service would be a perfect mirror image of a Courier company like Purolator with the only difference being that the Hourier would try to deliver packages at such a speed that it would endanger the lives of the senders, recievers, and the general public. The Hourier would drive at break neck speeds and stop for no cross walk nor school bus. Also while on foot between the vehicle and the recipient the Hourier would run like the wind and flip out at anyone who got in his way - "Holy #$$# get out of my way!"
The second idea is a High Speed Electric Bus. I'm not talking about wires inside your vidjo games, I mean the kind of bus that drives little old ladies to the superstore (afterall, they may not like those potatoes but gosh darn it they keep buying them, don't they?). The bus would be like a regular bus except perhaps more sleek in appearance. It would be powered by large electric motors and would travel at slightly higher than normal speeds. It's trademark difference however would be that it would accelerate at insane rates, causing wiplash to the driver and passengers. Also, mowing down of pedestrians would not be encouraged but not frowned upon either. Any time someone met their demise at the bumper of the HSEB company management would merely explain that people should be happy because we all have to work together to fight global warming. Come on guys, it's cereal.
So what do you think are these ideas great or what?
I have two ideas for businesses/inventions that I think would make some pretty good cash or at least a few laughs.
The first is a Hourier service. Notice that it's Courier with the C changed to a H so it's pronounced like Hurrier. The purpose of my Hourier service would be a perfect mirror image of a Courier company like Purolator with the only difference being that the Hourier would try to deliver packages at such a speed that it would endanger the lives of the senders, recievers, and the general public. The Hourier would drive at break neck speeds and stop for no cross walk nor school bus. Also while on foot between the vehicle and the recipient the Hourier would run like the wind and flip out at anyone who got in his way - "Holy #$$# get out of my way!"
The second idea is a High Speed Electric Bus. I'm not talking about wires inside your vidjo games, I mean the kind of bus that drives little old ladies to the superstore (afterall, they may not like those potatoes but gosh darn it they keep buying them, don't they?). The bus would be like a regular bus except perhaps more sleek in appearance. It would be powered by large electric motors and would travel at slightly higher than normal speeds. It's trademark difference however would be that it would accelerate at insane rates, causing wiplash to the driver and passengers. Also, mowing down of pedestrians would not be encouraged but not frowned upon either. Any time someone met their demise at the bumper of the HSEB company management would merely explain that people should be happy because we all have to work together to fight global warming. Come on guys, it's cereal.
So what do you think are these ideas great or what?
# posted by Sam Arsenault @ 4:42 PM 
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A wonderful set of ideas, without a doubt. The Hourier service would require a low to the ground vehicle with lots of cargo space, so I'm thinking a Dodge Magnum. They'd probably keep flipping the van over, and that would seriously get in the way of them hurrying along right fast.
My idea is the "MealMobile." It serves the same duties as "Meals on Wheels," but instead of some guy driving a regular car it would be a fridge mounted to a rolling chassis. It would obviously need an engine and the various associated amenities, but these would be disguised and hidden in such a way to make it look as if the fridge was doing all of the work.
/one of those american robot cars
My idea is the "MealMobile." It serves the same duties as "Meals on Wheels," but instead of some guy driving a regular car it would be a fridge mounted to a rolling chassis. It would obviously need an engine and the various associated amenities, but these would be disguised and hidden in such a way to make it look as if the fridge was doing all of the work.
/one of those american robot cars
# posted by 
: 11:50 PM
: 11:50 PM
Both vehicles need a cowcatcher if running people over will be part of their duties. Forget global warming...what about Man-Bear-Pig?
/Excelsior!
/Excelsior!
I think there is already a business like a Hourier service... have you ever been nearly run down by a bike messenger? Those guys are crazy. There is one riding around Ottawa who wears polo armor (but no helmet, go figure) so when he hits stuff his shins, knees and arms are okay and he just cracks his skull open. Safe!
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